Coupon Police Tried to Make False Arrest!

nerdycoupongirl · #1 (**permalink**) 11-05-2009, 10:11 AM

Ahhh, Publix. I truly truly love you, even if a few of your cashiers are coupon police!

Nerdy bee-bopped through Publix this morning, gathering her goodies.
She approached the smiling young cashier, unaware that the girl was secretly a member of.... THE COUPON POLICE!

As soon as Nerdy handed the girl her coupons, on came the police uniform!

"HALT! YOU HAVE COUPONS! REMAIN WHERE YOU ARE WHILE I SUSPICIOUSLY EXAMINE YOUR PURCHASES!"

Nerdy smiled and waited.

The white gloves handled each coupon as though it was a rattlesnake who hadn't eaten in a month. The magnifying glass scrutinized. And: A-HA! I'VE GOT HER!

"I can't accept these coupons, you bought four bottles of dressing and already used four coupons for them," Cashier Cop said triumphantly, holding up two coupons. She was about to take out her handcuffs and read Nerdy the Coupon Miranda, but Nerdy channeled her inner attorney.

"Ma'am, those two coupons are for PRODUCE, not the salad dressing. You get up to one dollar off produce for every two bottles of dressing you buy. Since I bought four bottles, I can use two coupons," Nerdy said sweetly, consulting her coupon brief.

Coupon Cop stared in dismay, and re-examined the coupons. "They are?"

"Yes, ma'am. They are." Bigger smile.

"Ohhhhhh," Coupon Cop said, deflated. She took her hand off the cuffs and slowly entered the coupons.

The rest of the coupons were subjected to drug testing and DNA checks, with Coupon Cop working hard to make sure that, yes, Nerdy HAD purchased six cans of tomatoes.

She tried her best, but in the end she had to tell the judge that everything was 100% legit. No charges were filed, and it was thrown out of court.

Nerdy took her buggy, thanked the cashier and told her she hoped she had a nice day, put on her sunglasses, picked up her briefcase, and left the store.

CASE DISMISSED!

This morning I got:

2 boxes Aunt Jemima whole grain pancakes
4 bottles Kraft ranch dressing
4 boxes Betty Crocker potatoes
4 bags Nestle morsels
6 cans Hunt's diced tomatoes
1 bag Wise low salt potato chips
1 50 ct. Ext. Str. Tylenol
1 bag onions
3 bananas

Q's used:
$1/2 Aunt Jemima
4, $1.50/1 Kraft ranch
2, up to $1.00 off produce WYB 2 Kraft dressing
4, .40/1 Betty Crocker potatoes
4, .50/1 Nestle morsels
2, .45/3 Hunt's tomatoes
$3/1 Publix Tylenol Q
$1/1 Tylenol MQ

OOP: $8.64
Savings: $48.43, almost $40.00

Sorry, Coupon Cop. Better luck next time.

alfina · #2 (**permalink**) 11-05-2009, 10:18 AM

Where did you get those produce coupons when you buy Kraft dressing?

savingsmom · #3 (**permalink**) 11-05-2009, 10:18 AM

cute

just one question what would be the Q miranda rights?

nerdycoupongirl · #4 (**permalink**) 11-05-2009, 10:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alfina

Where did you get those produce coupons when you buy Kraft dressing?

They were tearpad Q's that I've had for months.

Quote:

Originally Posted by savingsmom

cute

just one question what would be the Q miranda rights?

COUPON MIRANDA RIGHTS

You have the right to remain silent. If you do not remain silent, anything you say about your Q's can and will be used against you in the Coupon Court of Law. You have the right to consult with a coupon attorney. If you cannot afford a coupon attorney, you have been slack in your couponing, and we will provide one for you. Do you understand these rights as I have explained them to you?

cranra28 · #5 (**permalink**) 11-05-2009, 10:25 AM

So funny! Awesome savings and good for you for taking down the q police.

bnkkey · #6 (**permalink**) 11-05-2009, 10:33 AM

Love how you told the story!!!! Sometimes I think I could write a book and you know I bet it would be a best seller!!LOL Thanks for the laugh!!

amberautumn4 · #7 (**permalink**) 11-05-2009, 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nerdycoupongirl

Ahhh, Publix. I truly truly love you, even if a few of your cashiers are coupon police!

Nerdy bee-bopped through Publix this morning, gathering her goodies.
She approached the smiling young cashier, unaware that the girl was secretly a member of.... THE COUPON POLICE!

As soon as Nerdy handed the girl her coupons, on came the police uniform!

"HALT! YOU HAVE COUPONS! REMAIN WHERE YOU ARE WHILE I SUSPICIOUSLY EXAMINE YOUR PURCHASES!"

Nerdy smiled and waited.

The white gloves handled each coupon as though it was a rattlesnake who hadn't eaten in a month. The magnifying glass scrutinized. And: A-HA! I'VE GOT HER!

"I can't accept these coupons, you bought four bottles of dressing and already used four coupons for them," Cashier Cop said triumphantly, holding up two coupons. She was about to take out her handcuffs and read Nerdy the Coupon Miranda, but Nerdy channeled her inner attorney.

"Ma'am, those two coupons are for PRODUCE, not the salad dressing. You get up to one dollar off produce for every two bottles of dressing you buy. Since I bought four bottles, I can use two coupons," Nerdy said sweetly, consulting her coupon brief.

Coupon Cop stared in dismay, and re-examined the coupons. "They are?"

"Yes, ma'am. They are." Bigger smile.

"Ohhhhhh," Coupon Cop said, deflated. She took her hand off the cuffs and slowly entered the coupons.

The rest of the coupons were subjected to drug testing and DNA checks, with Coupon Cop working hard to make sure that, yes, Nerdy HAD purchased six cans of tomatoes.

She tried her best, but in the end she had to tell the judge that everything was 100% legit. No charges were filed, and it was thrown out of court.

Nerdy took her buggy, thanked the cashier and told her she hoped she had a nice day, put on her sunglasses, picked up her briefcase, and left the store.

CASE DISMISSED!

This morning I got:

2 boxes Aunt Jemima whole grain pancakes
4 bottles Kraft ranch dressing
4 boxes Betty Crocker potatoes
4 bags Nestle morsels
6 cans Hunt's diced tomatoes
1 bag Wise low salt potato chips
1 50 ct. Ext. Str. Tylenol
1 bag onions
3 bananas

Q's used:
$1/2 Aunt Jemima
4, $1.50/1 Kraft ranch
2, up to $1.00 off produce WYB 2 Kraft dressing
4, .40/1 Betty Crocker potatoes
4, .50/1 Nestle morsels
2, .45/3 Hunt's tomatoes
$3/1 Publix Tylenol Q
$1/1 Tylenol MQ

OOP: $8.64
Savings: $48.43, almost $40.00

Sorry, Coupon Cop. Better luck next time.

You should write a book, you are a great story teller and you know, it would sell, I would buy it, that's funny stuff! I am thinking you should really consider this....